What a Baby Does to Two People
by sammy911cute
Summary: The sequel to "What Love Does to Two People". Continue to follow Ryan and Natalia as they experience the joys of parenthood, and the struggles that come with it.
1. Chapter 1

~Calleigh's POV~

"Jayden," I called, waiting for the sound of her pounding feet in the hallway.

"Mama!" I scooped her up into my arms.

"Guess what?"

"What?"

"We're going on vacation!" Her mouth dropped open, and I couldn't help but smile.

"Where, where?!" She yelled, flapping her arms up and down in excitement.

"Atlantis!"

"Mama, where's that?"

"It's in—" I was interrupted by Jayden shrieks of delight when Eric walked through the door.

"Papi, we're going on vacation!"

"I know, did Mommy tell you where?" He picked up our daughter.

"Atwantis!" We both laughed at the mispronunciation of the resort.

We ended up showing her a video online, yielding screams of "nemo!" every time a fish passed by. I'd never seen Jayden more excited for anything, and I knew she wouldn't be sleeping much that night.

Eric and I were awake at four, and got the kids up at five. We knew it was going to be a battle getting both Jayden and Landon awake, fed, and dressed in time. Finally, by some miracle, we managed to get to the airport on time.

"Uncle Wyan!" Jayden ran towards Ryan, and he knelt down to the ground to pick her up.

"Hi, Jayden. Are you excited?"

"Yeah! We get to see nemo!" Ryan laughed and kissed her cheek, and I could see the excitement about having a child of his own.

"Aunt Natalia!" Jayden started to say, and Ryan transferred her to Natalia's arms.

"Is there baby yet?"

Natalia smiled. "No, not yet. But we'll let you know when she comes, okay?" Jayden had to be put on the ground to walk through security, but as soon as she got through she ran right back to Natalia.

"It's a girl?!" The look on her face was priceless, and it resulted in laughs from everybody.

"Yes, it's a girl." Jayden started dancing around in circles, and Natalia and Ryan were almost crying they were laughing so hard.

"I wanna meet her, Mommy!" my daughter said, and I sat her in my lap as we waited at the gate.

"I know you do. I think Uncle Ryan and Aunt Natalia want to meet her, too."

"They promised they'd tell me right when she gets here." Jayden crossed her arms and pouted.

"I think they will. We'll make sure we visit them." I exchanged glances with Natalia, who was over the moon excited about the arrival of the baby.

As we boarded the plane, we realized we didn't know where Horatio was. We assumed he had his own means of getting to the airport, but he never showed. I checked my phone and got the answer. "I hope you and the team enjoy your complimentary vacation to Atlantis Resort. All four of you and the kids better get on the plane, or you can consider yourself short of a job. Love, Horatio." I gasped, and showed the text to Ryan, Natalia, and Eric.

"Oh my God…we're not working a case," Ryan said. "He paid for our vacation."

"This is ridiculous," my husband commented.

"Well guys, there's not much we can do now," I said, seeing as we were about to take off.

"I guess we're going on vacation," Eric replied, and started to laugh. Soon we were all in smiles, and we realized that it was a much needed trip for all of us. It would be Ryan and Natalia's last trip before the baby came, and the first trip Eric and I had had in a while.

I realized en route that this vacation wasn't a bad thing, and that Horatio knew we all needed a vacation. Horatio was like family to all of us, and he was a family we would never forget.

~Ryan's POV~

I saw Natalia's face light up when we found out we were staying in The Cove, the same building we stayed in during our honeymoon. Horatio had set it up on purpose, but sent the Delko family to a more kid friendly building across the property.

We went up to our room and marveled at the view, before I lied down on the bed next to her.

"It feels like our honeymoon all over again," she said, smiling before she kissed me.

"I know. This is our vacation before the baby comes."

"Ryan, this is our last get away before we become parents." She sat up in bed and pushed her hair out of her face, clearly concerned.

"Don't worry about it now," I gently urged her back down on the bed. "We have plenty of time to worry." I grinned and kissed her, deepening it before she could object. Just as things were starting to get heated, my phone rang.

"It's Eric," I said, picking it up off the bedside table.

"Answer it."

I was about to make an excuse to stay in the room with Natalia, until I heard Jayden's voice on the other end.

"Uncle Wyan?" she asked. I smiled and put it on speakerphone so Natalia could hear.

"Hi, Jayden."

"Can you come to the pool with me, and Mommy, and Daddy, and Landon? Aunt Natalia can come too."

"Jayden, who are you calling?" I heard Calleigh's frantic voice in the background.

"It's Uncle Wyan!"

"Hi, Ryan, sorry that she called you before you guys had a chance to get settled in."

"No problem. We'd love to go to the pool with you guys, if that's what you were asking."

"Sure. Is half an hour good for you?"

"Uh, yeah. Nat and I can meet you at the front of your building?"

"Sounds great. Yes, Jayden, they're coming," she whispered to her daughter.

"Yay!" she screamed in the background.

"Alright, see you then. Bye." I looked up to see Natalia laughing, nearly in tears.

"I cannot get over the fact that she calls you Wyan." She burst out laughing again, and I couldn't help but join her.

"What can I say? She loves me."

"Aww. You're going to be a great dad, you know that right?"

"Well you're going to be a great mom." I pulled her in for a kiss, before reaching for our suitcase to unpack.

"We need to make Calleigh and Eric go down that big slide," I said.

"Oh, the one you made me go down?"

"Yeah. I'm sure Jayden will love to see them go down that."

"I know. I hope our daughter's just like her," she said, putting her hand on her swelled stomach. Now, at 28 weeks, her pregnancy was _finally_ noticeable.

"Come on, go put on your bikini. I want to see our little baby grow." She smiled and unpacked her suitcase, but not before I snuck in a kiss.

"Aunt Natalia!" Jayden ran towards us when she saw Natalia and I come around the corner, and the smile on her face was priceless.

"Hi, Jayden!" Natalia swooped her off the ground and kissed her cheek. Every single time I saw Natalia with Jayden or Landon, I couldn't help the smile that formed on my face. I caught my wife's eye and winked at her, and she smiled in return.

"See that slide, Jayden?" Natalia asked as she pointed to the huge Leap of Faith slide. It almost looked bigger the second time around.

"I'm not going down that!" Jayden exclaimed, her expression suddenly changing from excited to frightened.

"No you're not, but your Mommy and Daddy are," I added, smirking at Calleigh and Eric's shocked faces.

"Eric, you can go," Calleigh said as she gently pushed Eric in front of her.

"Mommy you have to go too!"

"Babe, why don't you go with them?" I glared at Natalia, but I knew there was no way out of it. All I could do was follow Calleigh and Eric up the staircase to the top.

"Oh my God…" Calleigh muttered, peering over the edge. "Ryan I can't do this."

"What, the ballistics expert can't go down a slide?" I teased, earning a laugh from Eric. As expected, she narrowed her eyes and turned back around.

"Actually, I think I'll go first."

~Natalia's POV~

"Where's Mommy and Daddy?" Jayden asked, as we waited. I gently bounced her up and down in my arms, anticipating watching Calleigh and Eric fly down the enormous water slide.

"Look, watch that slide. They'll come down soon."

"Mommy!" She exclaimed, just as Calleigh disappeared into the pool.

"Ready Jayden, here comes Daddy!" Just seeing her excitement over such a small thing completely made my day, and I was becoming more and more eager to hold my own daughter. Even now, only 11 weeks away, I was still in awe that there was a baby girl inside of me. Everything seemed surreal; like it was a dream. It was cliché and I knew it, but there were no other words to describe it.

"Uncle Wyan!" Jayden screamed out, snapping me out of my deep thoughts. I laughed as I watched my husband go down that same slide again, the one that we had both been on almost a year and a half prior.

"Aunt Natalia, why didn't you go?" Jayden asked with the sudden realization that I was with her and not with everyone else.

"Remember how I'm having a baby? Well the baby isn't big enough to ride that slide yet, just like you and your brother aren't either."

"So the baby's just like me?" Her eyes widened and a huge smile appeared across her face.

"Yes Jayden, the baby's just like you." I laughed and placed a kiss on her forehead. Just then, Calleigh, Eric, and Ryan all came around the corner, laughing and smiling at the pure exhilaration of the slide.

"See, it wasn't that bad," Ryan said to Calleigh, who looked the most relieved of them all.

"I'm done, I'm done," she replied, and I couldn't help but laugh. The same woman who worked with guns all day didn't like a simple water slide.

"Mommy guess what?"

"What, princesa?"

"The baby and I are friends because she can't go down the big slide and I can't go down the big slide either so we're the same!" I almost felt like picking her right back up and giving her a huge hug after that declaration.

"Yeah, maybe she'll even look like you too," Calleigh mentioned, winking at me. It was no secret that Calleigh and Ryan were both Caucasian, while Eric and I were both Hispanic. It was possible that my daughter and Jayden could look alike. However, it was much more likely that they would look completely different.

Eric took Landon out of my arms while Calleigh tended to Jayden. Calleigh and Eric had allowed Ryan and I to spend a lot of time with their kids, and I was finally getting used to carrying a child in my arms. I hadn't spoken to Ryan about it, but I figured he was feeling the same way.

"Eric, did you put sunscreen on Landon? And we have to change him, and then he'll need a nap…" Calleigh went on and on, and at that moment I realized I was in no way prepared for a baby at all. At times I thought I was, but reality always came back to bite me.

"Calleigh, I think I need baby boot camp from you sometime soon," I said as she expertly took care of her son.

"Oh yeah, don't worry I'll tell you all you need to know," she smiled, knowing exactly what I was feeling.

"Mommy I want to go down a slide," Jayden exclaimed, frustrated that she wasn't playing in the pool.

"Okay princesa, one minute."

"Do you guys want to split up? You can take the kids to wherever, and Nat and I will just meet you back here in a little while?" Ryan suggested.

"Sure, we'll text you in a bit," Eric replied as he took Landon from his wife's arms.

"Bye Aunt Natalia, bye Uncle Wyan!"

"Bye Jayden, we'll see you soon," Ryan said as he kissed her cheek. Once they were gone, Ryan and I were left standing together.

"Are you good?" He asked automatically, just checking to make sure everything was alright.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Remind me to talk to you about something later, though."

"Is it important?" I alarmed him with my statement.

"No, babe, everything's good." I smiled and took his hand, heading towards the adult only pool. We had fond memories of our honeymoon in that pool, and I was excited to go back. He sat down on one of the ledges in the pool, and I slid on his lap.

"I love you, Natalia," Ryan whispered out of the blue, and I smiled and kissed him.

"I love you, too." We stayed like that for almost an hour, chatting, laughing, and sneaking in little kisses. After a while, when the Sun was at its highest point, we decided to ditch the pool and go in search of Calleigh and Eric. We found them eventually, sitting together by the children's pool dutifully watching their kids.

"Hey, we were just about to call you guys," Eric mentioned when he saw us.

"Oh, good. We're going to head up to the room for a while, but dinner tonight?" I asked.

"Definitely. We might show the kids some of the fish this afternoon, if you're up for it."

"We'd love to!" Ryan answered, and I knew it was because he wanted to spend more time with Jayden and Landon.

"Okay, we'll get in touch with you later," Calleigh said as Ryan and I turned to leave.

After we had both showered, dressed, and were just relaxing, Ryan rolled over on the bed and draped his arm over me.

"Nat, what was bothering you earlier?"

"Oh, it's nothing, never mind."

"Are you sure?"

"Well I was just thinking, maybe we should re-read that What to Expect book or something. Because watching Calleigh with Landon this morning, I really don't have any idea."

"I brought it with us," Ryan said.

"Really? Wow good—" He cut me off with a kiss.

"Can we read it now?" I asked, and smiled when he grabbed it off his nightstand.

"Of course."


	2. Chapter 2

~Ryan's POV~

I don't really know why I threw _What to Expect When You're Expecting_ into my suitcase, but I was glad that I did. Natalia was right; we definitely weren't prepared. Even though Natalia still had a baby shower and I still had a Daddy diaper party, it wasn't enough.

"Go to the part where it talks about the week by week." Natalia and I loved to pour over the description of what our baby looked like that week, but we pretty much ignored everything else.

"Your baby is dreaming now," I narrated out loud.

"Aww, what do you think she's dreaming about?" Nat wondered, using the soft voice she only used when talking about our daughter.

"I don't know," I managed, still partially in awe.

"I think we need to read this book cover to cover."

I laughed. "Me too. Definitely."

And so we did. For the next two and a half hours we sat there on the bed together, flipping through page by page of all the information we needed to know. Things started to click for me, especially reading about the pregnancy symptoms. I realized why Natalia was so irritable and so tired, and why she suddenly changed moods. Of course, the worst of her symptoms were over (I hoped), but I also knew that we had a lot on our plate as we entered the third trimester. Big things were beginning to happen.

"I just want her to be here," I said, without even realizing it.

"Me too. I'm sick of being pregnant," she sort of laughed, only half joking.

"Hey, it looks good on you," I winked at her. Just then my phone rang from across the room, and I knew it was probably Calleigh or Eric.

"Maybe it's Jayden again," Natalia joked.

"Hello?"

"Hey, what are you and Nat doing in half an hour?" Calleigh's voice echoed through the speaker.

"Nothing, whatsup?"

"Come down, Jayden and Landon want to see all the fish. But I think Eric's more excited than they are," she said, laughing.

I laughed too, and replied. "Definitely, we'll meet you down there at 4:45?"

"Okay, see you then."

"Where are we going?" Natalia asked.

"To show Jayden and Landon the fish. And apparently Eric too."

"Oh. Actually I don't even think we saw all of the fish last time we were here. I think there's a whole section of just sharks and jellyfish that we missed."

"I know, I saw a sign for that when we walked in. I think it's called 'The Dig' or something like that."

Natalia rolled out of bed where she had been comfortably lying and changed clothes yet again. When we finally went down to the lobby and over to the building where the Delko's were staying, it wasn't hard to spot little Jayden. As always, she ran up to us screaming our names in her adorable high pitched voice. I picked her up and chatted with Calleigh and Eric, while Natalia held Landon. He was able to crawl but not walk, and even he looked big in my wife's arms. Natalia had always been skinny and small, and even though she was 28 weeks pregnant, it was hard to tell. At first, it had really concerned me. But after talking to her OB/GYN, we were told that Natalia was carrying the baby farther back inside of her, which made her show less. Fortunately, it was normal, and caused no harm to our precious daughter.

It turned out that there was a section of Atlantis called "The Dig", and we spent at least an hour touring it with the little ones. Jayden was completely fascinated by all of the aquariums, especially the clownfish.

"Nemo!" She exclaimed, every time a clownfish swam in front of her.

"Look, there's another one," Natalia said as she pointed to a different clownfish. Jayden couldn't even speak she was so excited, all she could do was squeal.

"I can't believe Nemo's actually real! Hi, Nemo!" She gently laid her hand on the glass, completely awestruck by the fish. Natalia looked touched by the whole thing, and I knowingly smiled at her. She smiled back, and that was all it took. I couldn't help but walk over and pull her close, only long enough to sneak a small kiss. But hey, I took whatever I could get.

As we all began to lose energy, we made our way towards the restaurant we were dining at. Dinner was nice, as always, and it was just a relief to not have to worry about work and cases for a time. Especially while enjoying a vacation with my wife and my closest friends.

We ended up staying in Calleigh and Eric's room for a while after dinner, spending more time with their kids and just enjoying each other's company. Jayden was lying down on the couch next to her father, while Landon was sleeping on Natalia's lap.

"I still can't believe Horatio paid for this. What was he thinking?" Eric said.

"I know. That man is truly amazing," Calleigh commented.

"Has anyone called him? I can't get through to him," my wife asked.

"No, I don't even know if the calls are going through, since we're out of the country," Eric replied as he gently stroked Jayden's dark curly hair. Landon stirred in Natalia's arms, and then began to cry.

"Aww, shh...," Nat cooed. She got up and slowly bounced him up and down, comforting him almost instantly. I don't even think she realized what she was doing, but her motherly instinct amazed me so much. Right away she knew exactly what to do, and how to handle the crying baby. She always confided in me about her worries and her fear about motherhood. But Natalia didn't even realize that she already knew what she needed to know. She'd always known.

~Natalia's POV~

"So, do you think you're ready?" Calleigh asked, after I had successfully quieted Landon.

"I don't know…I feel like there's still a lot I need to figure out," I replied.

"Don't worry, you'll be okay. I need to get him to bed, come with me and I'll show you how." I followed Calleigh to the room where the crib was, and handed her the baby. Calleigh expertly changed him, laid him in the crib, and clicked it shut all within a few minutes.

"Oh God Calleigh, I'm not ready at all," I began to panic.

"Nat, relax. Here come sit down." I sat.

"There's so much to do. I have to get the nursery done and there's the baby shower…and then I have to learn how to take care of a baby and change a baby—."

"Natalia. It's just the nerves talking. I've been here before. Trust me when I say, everything will be okay. And you guys are almost done with the nursery! I'm sure after the baby shower, which Alexx and I are planning by the way; you'll have everything you need."

"Thanks. It really means a lot to me."

"Of course, it's my first niece! But anyways, as soon as you hold her for the first time, all of your instincts just kick right in. I promise, you'll know what to do. And sure you might mess a couple things up, but it's a learning process. Besides, you already know how to do most of it. I've seen you with Landon, you're a pro!"  
"Even if I can do all that, I still have to worry about the breast-feeding. I don't even know if that's going to work out or not."

"You're still young, so most likely everything will be perfectly fine. And to be honest, it's weird at first. But once you get over that, it's one of the best things in the world. Once you have her you'll completely understand what I'm talking about."

"I hope so. I want to breastfeed, but I know Ryan wants to be able to feed her sometimes too."

"After about six weeks or so I switched to bottle feeding with both of them, and Eric really liked that. Plus, it gives you a chance to take a shower or something luxurious like that," Calleigh said, laughing.

"Oh, okay. Here's the thing. I'm really excited for her to come, and to be able to hold her and everything, but the whole idea of delivery is so scary." I realized I was confessing a lot to Calleigh, but I just needed advice from someone who knew what they were talking about. I figured after two kids, she must have some idea.

"The scariest part for me was the first time my water broke. It was such a new thing, and Eric wasn't home so I had to call him and wait, it was crazy. And the cramps and contractions…but once I got to the hospital I felt a little better. It was still painful, but I just felt safer, you know?" I nodded, because I didn't know what else to say. I was still processing the information.

"How bad was it?" I asked, afraid to hear the answer.

"Do you really want me to tell you? Well actually I'll just tell you anyways."

"Oh no."

"Honestly, it's pretty bad. With Jayden I got an epidural, and that was less painful, but it dragged on labor for so long. When I had Landon I just went natural, and it was much, much quicker. It hurt like a bitch, though."

"What do I do then?" I was confused, and afraid, and I didn't know what to think.

"Do what feels right for you. When you get to the hospital, you'll know whether or not you can handle it. The first time is always the hardest."

"Wow. I guess you really can't be prepared for this."

"You can't. The only thing you can do is pack your hospital bag with a hell of a lot of food, because after that baby comes that's all you'll care about. Trust me."

"Really? That's so funny," I said; glad to lighten the mood a little bit.

"Especially you, since you haven't eaten much the whole time you've been pregnant."

"I know, I really haven't had much of a textbook pregnancy at all."

"Not at all. As long as you and the baby are healthy, that's all that matters," Calleigh replied with a smile.

"Right," I agreed.

_Meanwhile…_

_~Ryan's POV~_

_ After Calleigh and Natalia left to put Landon down, it was just Eric and I. I had questions about the baby, I wasn't going to deny that, but I just didn't know how to ask him. Finally, I blurted them out._

_ "Eric…what's it like?" _

_ "What do you mean, having a baby?"_

_ "Yeah, just everything in general."_

_ "Well, it's definitely life changing. I feel like I'm a completely different person than I was before I had these two."_

_ "People keep telling me that, but I don't feel it yet. I just don't get it," I admitted, a little frustrated. _

_ "No, I know exactly where you're coming from. I was like that with Calleigh, too. I mean I tried to be there for her and everything, but nothing really clicked for me. But once you hold her for the first time, you'll feel it. Don't worry, man," he said, smirking a little._

_ "I hope so. I can only read so many books with Nat, and after that it all kind of blurs together."_

_ "I never paid attention in those books. It's all an experience thing. Believe me, it's a lot easier the second time around."_

_ "Woah, I can't even think about that right now. I have to figure out this baby first." I stopped him, since I was feeling a little overwhelmed._

_ "I know, I'm just messing with you. You'll be okay. And Nat will be, too."_

_ "What about the delivery? She's really paranoid about that, and I'm not much help to her."_

_ "I can't really describe it. It's like a beautiful thing and a terrible thing all mixed in one. I hate to get all mushy like this, but it's awful to see her in that much pain. Really, your heart will break watching Nat. But then it's all anticipation, waiting to hold your baby for the first time. And on top of that, Nat will probably be screaming and crying, and you'll probably want to break down in tears too."_

_ "Wow, it's really that bad?"_

_ "It's the most emotional moment of your life. I can't describe the feeling of the whole thing."_

_ "Wow." I was stunned. Just to hear Eric even say something like that was shocking to me, especially coming from someone like him. But the way he described the delivery really hit home for me, and I began to realize what the next couple months would bring for Natalia and me. _

_ "Don't worry, Ryan. You and Natalia will learn how things work and figure things out when the time comes. Everybody does." He smiled, amused by the panic I was going through._

_ "Thanks, Eric. I think I'm just nervous, you know? I like being in control of things, and there's absolutely no control in this situation."_

_ "You're right, there's nothing you can do. Especially being the guy, all you can do is run around and be there for them. At least until the baby comes." _

_ "Thanks again, man. I feel a little better now."_

_ "Hey, anytime." _

When Calleigh and I finally returned to the living room, we caught Eric and Ryan deep in conversation.

"Are we interrupting something?" Calleigh asked with a smile on her face.

"No, sweetheart, just baby talk," Eric replied, putting his arm around her as she sat down next to him.

"Oh, Nat and I were just talking about that, too. Really guys, everything falls into place. Don't worry too much."

"Honestly, you're both a lot more prepared than you think," Eric commented.

"Well I guess we'll find out," I said. After an hour or so more of chit chat and small talk, Ryan and I finally decided to call it a night.

"We'll talk tomorrow, and try to work something out," Calleigh remarked as she showed us out the door. Ryan laced his fingers through mine as we walked from their building to ours, and I smiled at him to show my appreciation.

"Hey, at least we have people who can help us," he said, returning the grin.

"Yeah, we're luckier than most."

"And I'm luckier than most other men," Ryan joked, pulling me in for a kiss.

"Funny."

"Aww, Nat. You know I love you."

"I love you too. And so does baby." I placed my hand on my swollen stomach, waiting for Ryan to lie down next to me in our bed.

"I wish she was here."

"Me too, Ry." He slowly lifted up my shirt, just enough to press a kiss to my skin. Gently, he laid his hand next to mine.

"Is she kicking now?" Ryan asked with a hopeful look in his eyes.

"No, but she was a couple minutes ago. She usually moves around when I lay down." Most other women carried their babies more forward in their bodies' than I did, so the kicks were much easier to feel. Ryan hoped every night that he could feel our daughter move around, but with no luck.

"What does it feel like, Nat?"

"Like butterflies."

He laughed and kissed me, still leaving one hand on my stomach.

"There, did you feel that?" I asked, awaiting his response.

"No." He looked sullen. Suddenly, I felt a large jab, and Ryan's face completely illuminated.

"Was that a kick?"

"Yes, Ry. You finally felt it!" I pressed a big kiss to his lips and snuggled closer to him, enjoying the moment we had awaited for so long.

"I love you, Natalia. I really, really love you."

"I love you too, babe. I love you, too."


	3. Chapter 3

**This is a longer chapter, and you guys are gonna kill me for the ending. Don't worry, I'll have a new chapter up soon :) **

**Oh and thanks for all of your reviews, they really make my day and motivate me to keep writing. You guys are the best 3**

~Ryan's POV~

"I can't believe it's already our last day," I said to Natalia. I glanced over at her when she didn't reply, but stopped at what I saw. She was sitting on our bed, legs crossed, with her hand on her stomach. Her eyes didn't even move, all she did was stare at the small bump that held our precious daughter.

"Nat? What's going on?" I tried again.

"Nothing…we're just so lucky. Life is such a fragile thing."

"What are you talking about?" I was confused at where she was going, but I didn't want to upset her.

"I had a dream last night…that we lost the baby."

"Natalia," I pulled her close and kissed her forehead. "It was only a dream."

"I know, Ry, it just felt real…sorry, I'm being crazy. Let's just get ready and go downstairs," she abandoned her thoughts and stood up, releasing herself from my arms. I was really confused at the whole thing, and I didn't know whether to follow her or to leave her alone. So, being myself, I did absolutely nothing. I just kept on getting ready, but glancing over at Natalia every couple seconds.

"Ryan! I can see you looking at me. It's fine!" She cried from the closet, where she was getting dressed.

"Sorry, sorry." And the issue never came up again. I never asked Nat what was going on with her that morning, and she never brought it up. In reality, neither one of us wanted to face the possibility that there was still a chance of a miscarriage. After all that we had been through, especially Natalia, she would never recover from something as devastating as that. And frankly, neither would I.

"Baby, are you all packed?" Nat asked as she placed a stack of folded clothes in our suitcase. It was getting late, near eleven, but we still had to finish packing for our flight the next morning.

"Just about. Are you?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"This week went by so fast," I remarked. "At least we got away one last time before the baby comes." I wrapped my arm around her waist and pulled her towards me, kissing her before she could object.

"You know, I was thinking," she started, with the mischievous look I knew all too well.

"Go on…" I kissed her again, a little more forcefully this time.

"Maybe we should go out with a bang, you know, since it _is_ our last night here." She barely touched my lips with hers, a trick that I knew but that worked every time.

"Are you sure about that?" I provoked her, waiting for the answer I wanted.

"They say pregnancy increases a woman's sex drive." That was all I needed to hear. I fell back on the bed and pulled her on top of me, and she forced her lips onto mine. I was determined to give Natalia the best sex I could give her, since I knew we were running out of time. And it was the best night we had had in a _long_ time.

~Natalia's POV~

We only had six weeks left to go. That was it. The nursery walls were painted, the baby shower was complete, and everything was done except for a couple pieces of furniture that had to be put together. I was really excited, and so was Ryan. Now it was all anticipation; just waiting and waiting for her to arrive. Finally, finally, things were starting to fall into place. Or so I thought.

"Hello?"

"Natalia, it's me, Anya."

"Hey, what's going on?" My younger sister didn't call that often, at least not unless it was important.

"I think I did something wrong. Very, very, wrong." I could tell from her voice she had been crying, she was stuttering over words and taking shallow breaths in between sentences.

"What did you do? You didn't kill someone, did you?"

"No, I didn't kill anyone. Well actually maybe I did. I…I had an abortion."

"What? Wait, since when were you pregnant? Anya!" I didn't know what to say. I was completely shocked.

"I'm sorry, Natalia, I'm sorry. It was wrong, and I'm going to hell, but I just couldn't do it..I," she broke off and burst into tears, sobbing through the phone.

"What even happened?" I stopped and changed my approach, remembering the feelings I had when I found out I was pregnant. "Anya…it's alright. Things are okay. Just calm down and let's talk about this."

"Natalia, it's not okay! I had sex with this guy I met at the club, I don't know his name, I don't have his number, I don't know anything! And then a week ago I found out I was pregnant. Pregnant, Nat! I'm twenty two…I can't have a baby! I'm still in school. But what have I done?" I listened in sadness as I heard my baby sister bawling over the phone, feeling guilty and horrible.

"Anya, stop, stop. You made the right decision. If it's what's best for you, then that's what's best for you. Nobody is stopping you, and nobody is judging you. If you want to drive down here and stay for a while, it's okay. I'm here if you need me."

"Thanks, Nat, but I don't think I can. Seeing you with the baby and everything…I'd feel too guilty."

"Anya. Are you seriously okay? I'm worried about you."

"Don't be, Natalia. You have your own baby to worry about."

"But I need to take care of you—," I was interrupted by Ryan walking through the door. I walked away from him before he could come over to kiss me. It wasn't the time.

"Just go. I heard Ryan come in. Really, Natalia. I feel better just talking to you about it; at least I know there's one person who won't judge me."

"Anya, I'll always love you no matter what you do. Call me if you need anything."

"I love you too, Nat. And thanks, I will. Bye."

"What's going on?" Ryan asked when I hung up the phone.

"It's Anya…"

"Is she okay?"

"Yes, Ryan, she's fine." I was not in the mood to talk to Ryan about it.

"Woah, okay. You don't have to tell me."

"She got an abortion," I snapped back at him.

"What? She was pregnant?"

"Yeah. She couldn't keep the baby, she's still in school. So she got an abortion."

"Well, did she ask you first? She did all of this by herself?" He threw his jacket down on the couch and stepped towards me, involving himself farther in the conversation.

"No she didn't ask me first, because I'm not her baby sitter. Look, Ryan, this is not about whether you, or me, or anyone else agrees with her decision. There's nothing we can do about it, except support her because she's clearly not doing too well!"

"Where was the guy in all of this? Shouldn't he have a say?"

"She doesn't even remember the guy. And either way, it's her body and her decision, not some asshole who doesn't give a shit about her."

"So you're saying that if you wanted an abortion, it wouldn't have anything to do with me?"

"No, Ryan, I did not say that," I replied through gritted teeth.

"Well that's what you implied."

"For the last time, Ryan, this is NOT ABOUT YOU!"

"I never said it was! But if we were in this situation, I would think you would fucking ask me before you did something like that!"

"But we're NOT in this situation. We're having a baby in six weeks, so get over yourself, Ryan!"

"No, Natalia, YOU get over YOURSELF! Stop being so selfish and admit that you're actually wrong, and that maybe her decision wasn't the right one!"

"Get out, Ryan."

"Get out? Leave my own house?"

"Yes, leave OUR house and GET THE FUCK OUT!" I screamed.

"You know what, fine." He picked up his keys and jacket and slammed the door behind him. All too soon I realized what had just occurred, but it didn't change how angry I was with Ryan.

~Ryan's POV~

"What the hell was I thinking?" I thought to myself as I angrily pulled out of the driveway. I hated fighting with Natalia. But she was wrong and she knew it.

"Where the fuck do I go?" I thought again, hitting the steering wheel in frustration. So I went to the only place I knew to go.

"Wolfe? What are you doing here?"

"Am I interrupting anything important?" I half yelled, impatiently leaning against the doorway.

"No, come in."

"Walter, I got into a fight with Natalia."

"About what?" He passed me a beer and sat down at the barstool across from me.

"I don't even know, abortions. Why did we even argue about that, it doesn't even have to do with us?!"

"Wolfe, calm down. Drink your beer, take a deep breath, and tell me what you fucking did this time."

"Walter, it's not my fault!" He glared at me. "Fine, maybe I overreacted a little. But so did she!"

"I don't care what she did. Look it's automatically your fault, so suck it up and figure out how to fix this!"

"Her sister had an abortion, and Nat completely sided with her. I said that—"

"Ryan! Listen, I don't want to hear what the fight was about. That's really none of my business. But what is my business is the fact that you're here in my house, drinking beer and recounting your argument, when you should be in your house, eating dinner with your PREGNANT WIFE." And then I realized what was going on. The anger that had been boiling up inside me for the past hour had simmered away, and left me with guilt and remorse.

"Shit." I pounded my fist on the table. "What do I do now?"

"Natalia's emotional right?"

"Walter, she's fucking pregnant of course she's emotional. And what does that have to do with anything?"

"Well what do you think she's doing right now? I highly doubt she's happily waltzing around the kitchen. She's probably crying in the house, upset at you and upset at herself."

"Fuck you're right. Walter I have to fix this. But how? I can't do the wrong thing now; she'll really flip out on me."

"Obviously I'm not the best with the ladies, or I'd be talking to her instead of you. But the best I can tell you is to suck it up and buy her some flowers, or something nice that she likes. And then walk inside and give them to her."

"It's not that easy. She kicked me out."

"Then get back on that doorstep and beg for your forgiveness."

"Walter…"

"Ryan! This is your wife and your baby. She needs you right now. Don't screw this up again."

"You're right, I have to go." I took off and followed Walter's advice. I bought a bouquet of white roses, which I knew were her favorite. I even took the liberty to buy an "I'm sorry," balloon. Now that some time had passed after the argument, I realized I had to fix things as quickly as possible. I was genuinely worried about Natalia, especially so close to the arrival of our daughter.

I pushed the doorbell once, hoping and praying that she would answer. When nothing happened, I pressed it again. I was getting anxious, but finally she pulled opened the door.

"I'm so sorry, Natalia. I love you so much, I shouldn't have said what I said…and I bought you flowers."

"Ryan, it's okay," she replied with a small smile and misty eyes.

"No, Natalia, it's not okay. I'm really, really sorry."

"Here, come inside. She stepped aside to let me in the doorway, and I set the flowers and the balloon down on the table next to me.

"You even got a balloon?"

"Walter's idea. Don't be mad."

"Ryan, I'm not mad at you. I love you, and I'm sorry for the way I treated you." She placed her hand on my shoulder and leaned up to kiss me, and I kissed her back. We stood there in our foyer, wrapped up in each other's arms, silently forgiving each other for the insults we had thrown.

"Do you want to go put together the crib?" I whispered in her ear, still holding her close. She pulled back and smiled, pressing a kiss to my lips. So we sat there on the floor in the nursery, me in my work clothes and her in my sweatshirt and boxers. I assembled the white, rustic looking crib, while she put the sheets and mattress together. Finally, when everything was done, we stepped back to look at the finished nursery.

"I think we're ready," she stated as I wrapped my arm around her waist.

"Me too. I'm ready." I barely finished my sentence before I pressed my lips to hers. I couldn't keep myself away from her, especially after being welcomed back into my own house. I placed both my hands on her hips and pulled her towards me, while continuing our kiss. Everything was going fine until Natalia winced, and suddenly broke away.

"What happened? Are you okay?' I asked, instantly concerned.

"Nothing, the baby just kicked really hard." Natalia bit her lip, still cringing in pain.

"Are you sure that was it? It wasn't…something else?"

"Yeah, it's happened before. Look, I just need to lie down." I put a protective hand on her back as we walked back to our bedroom.

"Yell if you need me." I kissed her forehead and went back downstairs. I knew Natalia was cranky and tired, and I wasn't about to get into it with her again.

When I returned to our room, two and a half hours later, the only difference was that she had taken off my sweatshirt and was left with my t-shirt. For the last eight or ten weeks of her pregnancy, Natalia had taken to wearing my clothes around the house. Especially once she was put on maternity leave.

I didn't want to wake her, so I did my best to keep quiet as I slipped underneath the covers next to her. I had to admit; I was tired from the day's events. So I even surprised myself when I awoke around three A.M.

"Natalia?" I asked, when I came to the realization that she wasn't in the bed next to me. As I was getting up to find her, I put my hand over the sheets on her side of the bed. They were soaked through.

"Natalia," I tried again. I found her standing in our bathroom, staring at herself in the mirror.

"What's going on?"

"Cold sweats."

"You're completely drenched. And so are the sheets?"

"I know, I know. I just need to change shirts."

"Is this normal? Do we need to call Dr. DeLangio?"

"No, Ryan, everything's fine. This happened to Calleigh, too."

"Alright, if you say so." The idea of just letting it go didn't appeal to me at all, but Natalia looked like she wanted nothing more but to go back to sleep. So I let her.

The next morning, everything was back to the way it normally was. I went to work, Natalia stayed home on maternity leave, and then I came home at 6:15.

"How are my two favorite girls?" I asked as I walked in the door, simultaneously kissing Natalia.

"Doing just fine. And so is your favorite dog." Benny came running around the corner, crashing into my feet like he always did. I picked him up and scratched his head, smiling as he tried to lick my face.

"Do you want anything? I can make you something?"

"No, I ate a while ago. There's spaghetti in the fridge for you if you want it."

"Awesome, thanks, Nat." I kissed her cheek and went off in search of dinner. I had missed lunch since I was out in the field all day, and I had been looking forward to a home cooked meal. The rest of the evening was uneventful, but once we were both asleep, things were much, much different.

Again, I woke up in the middle of the night, sometime around 2 or 3. Natalia was in the bathroom, cleaning herself up and changing the shirts she soaked through every night. I still didn't think it was normal for something like this to happen, but I also didn't want to scare Natalia. I quietly entered our bathroom and gave her a hug, since she looked pretty miserable.

"Nat, you're shivering."

"I told you, cold sweats." She was sweaty, enough to drench her clothes and sheets, but she was also trembling like she was freezing cold.

"You want anything?" I asked like I asked every night.

"Just a new shirt." I went and fetched her another one of my t-shirts, which she slipped on and went straight back to bed. This went on for days, almost a whole week went by. And finally, I confronted Natalia about it.

"I really think we need to call Dr. DeLangio. This just doesn't seem normal to me."

"Ryan, don't worry about it. Everything's fine."

"Please? It's really scaring me." Natalia sighed.

"Look, it's Friday now. If this is still happening on Monday, then we'll call her." It wasn't what I was hoping for, but it was all Natalia was willing to do. And like clockwork, it happened again on Saturday night.

I rolled over and felt the dampness of the sheets, and drowsily grabbed a new t-shirt before finding Natalia in the bathroom.

"Oh, did you already change shirts? I'll go put this one back." But before I could leave, she grabbed my arm to stop me.

"No. I didn't change shirts, because it didn't happen tonight."

"But the sheets are all wet…"

"Ryan, I think my water broke." She stood there looking at me with frightened eyes.

"What?" I was in a state of shock. I didn't know what to say, what to do, what to feel…I didn't know anything anymore.

"The baby's coming, Ryan. Right now."


	4. Chapter 4

_"Ryan, I think my water broke." She stood there looking at me with frightened eyes._

_"What?" I was in a state of shock. I didn't know what to say, what to do, what to feel…I didn't know anything anymore._

_"The baby's coming, Ryan. Right now."_

"Okay. I'll call Dr. DeLangio." I had her on speed dial, in preparation for this moment.

"Hello?"

"It's Ryan Wolfe. Natalia's water just broke."

"Don't panic, just drive her to the hospital and I'll take it from there." I hung up the phone and turned back to Nat, who still hadn't moved from where she was standing.

"Ryan, this is six weeks too early. This is _not_ supposed to be happening right now. I'm not ready, I can't do this. Not now, not yet," she rambled, staring at me with fear in her eyes.

"Natalia, we just talked about this today. You can do it." I took both of her hands and kissed her forehead, and I could sense her fear. I was trying not to show how scared I was, and how nervous I was feeling. I had thought about this situation many times in my head, but when it came to the real thing, all the preparation went straight out the window.

"We just need to go, now," she said, her voice getting slightly higher as she tightened her grip on my hands.

"I'm cramping already, Ryan, let's go." I was so thankful we had packed our hospital bag just days before. I threw it into the car, helped Natalia into the passenger's seat, and drove faster than I had ever gone before. I made the drive to the hospital in three minutes, which was almost impossible. The sight of Dr. DeLangio waiting for us at the entrance was such a relief.

"Hi Ryan, hi Natalia, are you guys ready to have this baby?" I smiled when I heard her question, I couldn't help it. Natalia was really about to give birth to our baby. Within minutes Dr. DeLangio had Natalia dressed in a hospital gown and lying in the bed.

"You're three centimeters dilated. I'll keep checking in on you. Press that button to page me if you need anything." And just like that, it was Natalia and I alone in a hospital room, where we had been so many times before.

"Ryan…this is it." She smiled up at me, reaching for my hand. I took hers and entwined our fingers together, leaning down to kiss her.

"I know…I can't believe it. Soon, she'll be here." I was still stunned. I didn't know what to say, didn't know what to do…and Eric and Calleigh were right. There really was no preparation for this.

"Call into work and tell H you won't be there." I couldn't help but laugh.

"Natalia, I could care less about work right now."

"Just call them. I'm sure everyone will want to know," she trailed off as she shifted around uncomfortably. I did call Horatio, even though it was four in the morning and he probably was not awake. I don't even remember the conversation we had. It was too low of importance at the time.

"Are you okay?" I found myself asking every time she had contractions, which were becoming more and more frequent as time passed.

"Ryan I swear if you ask me that one more time I am kicking you out of this room!"

"Welcome to parenthood," a sympathetic nurse said as she put a comforting hand on my shoulder. It had been two hours since we had been admitted to the hospital and she was only five centimeters dilated.

"You're halfway there, Natalia. Hang in there," Dr. DeLangio said as she walked out the door. I rubbed comforting circles on my wife's hand in an attempt to distract her.

"Ryan…it hurts…" she moaned, wincing in pain.

"I know, baby, I know. You'll get through it, I promise." I just didn't know what to say.

"I can't, it's so bad, RYAN!" She raised her voice during the contraction. And it happened over and over again. I was in pain myself, watching Natalia go through childbirth. I was nervous, I was excited, I was upset…the only thing I could do was go back and forth between pacing around the room and coaching Natalia. Thankfully, Dr. DeLangio walked back into the room.

"How are you doing Natalia?" She asked as she snapped on a pair of gloves.

"It hurts." Her voice was weak, and I could hear how much pain she was in.

"Do you want an epidural? We can ease the pain for you."

"No, I want this over and done with NOW."

"You're almost there, kiddo. You're at six and a half right now. Keep it up," she rubbed the inside of Natalia's leg comfortingly. "And you too, Dad. Hang in there." Dr. DeLangio winked and headed out the door again.

"Nat, you can do it, you're almost there," I said as I sat down next to her. She said nothing, but used the brief time in between contractions to pull her hair up and out of the way. Within the next thirty minutes, I entered the longest two hours of my life.

"Alright, you're at seven centimeters. Get ready for it." And it was intense. Not even ten minutes had passed since Dr. DeLangio had left before Natalia was screaming.

"RYAN DO SOMETHING!" she yelled, grabbing my hand and squeezing it as hard as she could. Natalia was a strong woman, and she could really squeeze my hand tightly. But I knew the minor pain I was in was nothing compared to what my wife was going through.

"Just a little longer, Nat. Almost."

"OH MY GOD," she screamed, covering her face with her hands. When she reached for my hand again, I could see the tears in her eyes. Natalia was _crying_, it hurt so badly. Like Eric said, I was about ready to scream and cry myself. The level of emotion that we were both feeling at that moment was almost too much to bear. And the baby wasn't even born yet.

"Ryan, please, I want an epidural now. Get me one, now," she begged, crying and groaning all in one.

"I can't, it's too late. You have to go through with this." My heart was breaking to see Natalia in the writhing pain she was in, but I knew we had passed the point of no return. She had to deliver the baby the natural way.

"No, Ryan, it's awful. PLEASE!" The contractions continued. She couldn't speak through them; all she could do was cry and breathe, nearly cutting off circulation to my hands in the process.

"Natalia, you're at nine centimeters, only half an hour left."

"FUCK!" She was screaming bloody murder at this point. I had never seen someone in so much pain; it was as if someone was torturing her beyond belief. Beads of sweat coated her forehead, matting her hair down. They mixed with the tears that were constantly running down her face, a reminder of the extreme pain she was experiencing. And meanwhile, all I could do was hold her hand and try not to break down myself.

The last half an hour was such a blur. Natalia looked like she was on the edge of death, I was shaking and confused and didn't know what was going on, and meanwhile a swarm of nurses and doctors had suddenly entered the room.

"Dad, get on that side of her. Natalia, I need you to push for ten seconds," Dr. DeLangio dictated. I grabbed tightly on to her left hand and encouragingly rubbed her leg.

"Push, Natalia, push!" She tucked her chin to her chest and pushed as hard as she could.

"JESUS CHRIST!" Her yells echoed throughout the room, and probably through the rest of the hospital wing.

"She's crowning, Natalia. Do you want to touch her?" I glimpsed down and saw the top of my daughter's head. It was unreal, I couldn't even believe it. Everything about that moment was priceless, and it was by far the most amazing feeling in the world.

"NO JUST GET IT OUT!"

"One more big push, Natalia, one more big push!" And then, our daughter was out. Her high pitched cries filled the room, and I watched in awe as the nurses placed her on Natalia's lap.

"Hi, baby. Hi," she cooed, gently touching our daughter's cheek. Nat looked up at me with wet eyes, and I didn't even realize I was crying too until she wiped a tear off of my face.

"Dad, do you want to cut the cord?" I turned around and somebody handed me a pair of scissors. With shaking hands, I snipped the umbilical cord and turned back to Natalia, beaming with pride. A nurse placed our baby, freshly wrapped in a receiving blanket, into Natalia's welcoming arms.

"You did it, Nat. I'm so proud of you." I kissed her cheek and admired the new baby she had just brought into the world. I couldn't explain the emotions I had to anyone. We stayed like that, crying and smiling and simply enjoying the new life we had created.

"No, Ryan. We did it together," she replied with the biggest smile on her face. After the placenta had been delivered and Natalia was cleaned up, the three of us were left alone.

"Ryan, come lay with me," she requested, her voice slightly hoarse from yelling. I was more than happy to comply. There was nothing else in the world I wanted more than to lay with Natalia and our new baby girl, who was sleeping soundly in Natalia's arms. I put my arm around her shoulders and pressed a kiss to her cheek, using my other hand to lightly run my fingers over the baby's cheek.

"She's perfect, Natalia. Look at her…" I trailed off, unable to tear my gaze from the newborn in front of me.

"I know. I'm so happy, Ryan, I never knew it would be like this," she laughed as she spoke, and I laughed with her. We were experiencing a joy we had never known before, and it was such a strong emotion to feel.

"Me either, Nat…"

"Here, do you want to hold her?" She asked softly, slightly extending out her arms.

"Yes," I whispered back. I wanted to start crying again, as soon as I took her from Natalia. Her skin was so soft, and her fingers and everything else about her were so little. She stirred in the blanket and began to wake up.

"Shh, don't worry, Daddy's here. It's okay," I whispered, tenderly holding her tiny hand. I glanced over at Natalia, only to see she was fast asleep. I managed to sneak out of the hospital bed with my daughter still in my arms, and gently paced around the room.

"See her, over there? That's your Mommy. Your beautiful, beautiful Mommy." I pressed a kiss to the baby's forehead. I stayed like that for hours, holding my daughter and talking to my daughter as Natalia took a much deserved nap. When she woke up, four hours later, the first thing she asked for was the baby.

"Our parents are outside. Can I bring them in?" I asked, hoping it was okay. I was dying to see my parents, and to see their reaction when they met their first grandchild.

"Yes, please, go get them." I walked out to the waiting room and saw everyone we knew there. My family, Natalia's family, Horatio, Calleigh, Eric, Walter, and many other members of the team. They all stared at me as I approached them, waiting for the news.

"Emily Danyelle Wolfe, 6 pounds, born at 3:25 PM." I couldn't stop the huge smile that emerged on my face as I broke the news to everyone.

"Congratulations!" My mom was the first to hug me, and I suddenly understood the love a parent had for their child.

"Natalia wants to see our parents first," I said as I began to walk back towards our hospital room, with my parents and her parents in tow. Her father was the first one into the room, and the first person to see his daughter and granddaughter.

"Hi, Dad!" Nat's peppy voice exclaimed, sitting up straighter to kiss her father's cheek.

"Congratulations, sweetheart, she's beautiful," he remarked. Gently, she transferred the baby into Mr. Boa Vista's arms and we all smiled as he began to choke up.

"It's our first grandchild," he said to his wife.

"It's everyone's first grandchild," my dad added in, earning a laugh from Natalia and I. As the baby was passed around from grandparent to grandparent, all I could think about was the fact that I had a daughter. She was finally here, and Natalia and I were finally parents. It was unbelievable.

After my parents and her parents had their time with the baby, reality started to kick in.

"Daffodil, we have to get back to work," her father said regretfully, pressing a kiss to his daughter's forehead.

"It's okay, thanks for stopping by," Natalia replied.

"Of course, it's my granddaughter! Goodbye, Ryan, and congratulations to both of you." He nodded and walked out the door, with his wife closely behind him.

"Well, we should probably be going to," my mother echoed.

"Hey, on your way out, would you mind sending the rest of the team in?" Natalia asked, as she handed our newborn daughter to me. When my Mom and Dad left, I turned back towards my wife and my baby.

"Natalia...," I paused, shifting my gaze to the baby as I transferred her to Nat's arms.

"What?" she asked, with a soft, understanding voice.

"I love you so much…for giving me this." I leaned over and kissed her, and she kissed me back. Before she could reply, the rest of the CSI team entered the room.

"Congratulations!" Eric exclaimed, walking in with open arms. I laughed and gave him a hug, excited to finally see everyone.

"Oh, Natalia, she's beautiful," Calleigh cooed as she admired the baby.

"Do you want to hold her?" As our new daughter was once again passed from person to person, I couldn't help but feel a little jealous that they were holding her and not me. I couldn't even deny, I was on cloud nine.

By the time everyone had left, I could see the energy was drained out of Natalia. I gently set our sleeping baby down in the hospital crib and sat next to Nat on her bed.

"How do you feel?" I lightly pressed a kiss to her temple.

She sighed. "Very sore."

"Understandable. Do you want anything?"

"To go home." Unfortunately for her, I was the one who got to return to the house first. With a dirty diaper and Emily's receiving blanket in tow, I assigned myself the task of getting Benny acquainted with our new baby.

"Benny," I called, and whistled as I walked in the front door. The still little ball of fur rocketed around the corner, slamming his face right into my feet.

"Come here, boy," I led him into the nursery and shut the door, waiting for him to familiarize himself with the room.

"Look, smell this." Much to my relief, he didn't bite them or try to eat them. Instead he merely sniffed them and walked off, continuing to explore the room. I folded up the blanket, disposed of the diaper, and willed myself to take him out for a quick walk before I returned home with Natalia and Emily in tow.

As I entered into my wife's hospital room, I was hit with a barricade of questions I had been expecting.

"Did he take it well? Did he try to eat it? Does he like the nursery?"

"Relax, babe, everything went fine. I don't think he cares at all."

"Well, we'll see what happens when we bring her home."

And that's just what we did.


	5. Chapter 5

**Just thought you guys should know, the rest of the story will probably be written majority in Ryan's POV. I'll switch to Natalia every once in a while, but I feel like the story gets told more through Ryan's eyes.**

When we got home, we realized that we didn't really know what to do with ourselves. Emily was asleep; and she didn't need anything. So I whistled, provoking Benny to speed around the corner like he usually did.

"Hi, boy, meet Emily," Natalia offered, crouching down to the floor and cautiously allowing Benny to sniff the pink bundle. He explored the whole blanket, poking his nose into it and even licking Emily's tiny hand. Benny was no threat to our precious newborn.

"Should we put her in the crib?" Natalia asked as we stood in the middle of our living room.

"I guess…I don't really know," I admitted. But putting her in the crib proved to be much more difficult than I thought.

"Okay, be gentle, Ry, don't wake her up." As carefully as I could, I unbuckled the seat belt in Emily's car seat, and tenderly slipped my hands under her tiny body. Even before I could lift her up, she began to stir. Within seconds, her shrill cries filled the air.

"Come here," Natalia took her out of my hands and placed Emily against her shoulder, soothingly rubbing the baby's back. She paced slowly around the room in an attempt to calm the baby down, but with no luck.

"Let me try." I took the baby from my wife with some strange idea that I could calm her down. However, my efforts did nothing.

"Maybe she's hungry?" I suggested, slightly raising my voice to be heard over the cries.

"I _just _fed her before we left the hospital."

"Does she need to be changed?"

"Check." Of course. The last thing I wanted to do was change a diaper, but I knew I had to learn sooner or later. I placed the baby on the changing table and strapped her in. I must have looked a little confused, because Natalia gently shoved me out of the way and took over.

"Where did you learn to do that?" I asked, slightly amazed at how quickly she had changed, and ultimately quieted, our baby.

"I don't know, Ry. Somewhere." I watched as she gently set Emily down in the crib, and tried to click it shut. Just as we turned to leave, her piercing cries filled the room once again. Natalia sighed and returned to the crib. This time, the pacing and cooing worked, and Emily was back asleep within minutes.

"Try to be quiet about it," I whispered as Nat moved to close the crib.

"I'm working on it," she hissed. Thankfully, by some miracle, our daughter stayed sleeping. Natalia grabbed the baby monitor on her way out of the nursery, and headed upstairs. I was a couple steps behind her, and by the time I arrived in our room she was sound asleep on the bed. Fully dressed, not even under the covers. But the idea of sleep sounded amazing, even though we hadn't even spent one night in our house. It was four in the afternoon, but I was completely worn out. I followed Natalia's example and nearly passed out on the bed, and didn't wake up until Emily's frequent crying echoed through the baby monitor.

"I'll get her," I mumbled to Natalia, who was just waking up herself. I entered the nursery, down the hall from our room, and lifted the screaming baby out of the crib.

"Hey, pumpkin, shhh. It's okay, Daddy's got you," I whispered in her ear, patting her back sympathetically.

"Don't cry," Natalia consoled as she prepared to breastfeed her. I didn't know what to do; I didn't know what Nat wanted me to do. If she wanted me to stay I would gladly oblige, but if she wanted me to leave I would. So I stood there, halfway turned to exit, when she stopped me.

"It's okay, you can stay." She didn't even look up from the baby, but I took it as a welcome opportunity to bond with both Natalia and Emily. Gently, I sat next to Natalia on the bed and snuck my arm around her shoulder.

"Do you know how to do it? Should I get something?" I asked. I was stuttering, and I admit I was a little nervous. The whole idea of breastfeeding was uncharted territory for me, and I almost felt out of place witnessing it.

"Ryan, calm down. I think I'm okay." I realized as she spoke that she had already been feeding Emily for a couple minutes, who was happily gurgling as much milk as she could fit in her mouth. The whole process was amazing. I'm pretty sure I sat there and stared, almost jealous of Natalia for being able to share such an intimate experience with our baby. Either way, I revered my wife for being able to successfully breastfeed our daughter. At that moment I was hit with a realization—a sudden epiphany that pulled forward a new kind of love. The arrival of Emily erected a bond between Natalia and I, and now it was stronger than it ever was before.

~Natalia's POV~

Breastfeeding was complicated. It was hard, it was time consuming, and I was completely on my own. Ryan was no help, as much as he wanted to be, and without the nurses there, I was left to pull through and figure it out by myself. To start things off, Emily was crying. The nurses, family friends, Calleigh, and countless other people had warned me to feed the baby before she started crying, otherwise it was that much more difficult. And it was. It took me at least ten long, frustrating minutes to position myself and Emily to latch on correctly. The sensation of a newborn baby, attached to my exposed breast and drawing milk out of me was strange, and I was nervous, anxious, and overall uncomfortable to be experiencing it. But at last, after fumbling around, I felt Emily begin to contently drink the milk. Sometime in the midst of all of this madness, I felt Ryan press a kiss to my temple.

"Babe, you're doing great," he whispered in my ear.

"Thanks," I half-heartedly mumbled back. I didn't want to talk to him. I wanted to finish feeding my daughter and return to sleep, which I had gotten next to none of in the past three days or so. There's that word again, _daughter_. It was still foreign to me. The whole concept of a baby was foreign to me. I snapped out of my trance and returned my focus to Emily. I realized that it had already been twenty minutes, which probably meant it was time to switch breasts. At least I thought the nurse said something along those lines.

I hastily pulled my shirt halfway down as I shifted Emily in my arms, preparing to burp her. How I remembered to do that was beyond me, but it seemed almost instinctive. _What? _I thought to myself. _Since when did I have a motherly instinct? _Soon enough, I realized the part of the "instinct" I had forgotten. Within seconds of rhythmically patting her back, Ryan and I found ourselves coated with baby spit up. We glanced at each other, but did not move from our positions. Emily began to cry; I assumed she was frustrated with me for not feeding her. _So demanding_, I thought to myself.

"Hey, hey, it's alright," I cooed, gently placing a kiss on her soft head of light colored hair. As quickly as I could, which didn't say much, I offered her my right breast and let out a relieved breath when she latched on and began to eat. Finally, after twenty _more_ minutes, she released the grip her mouth had and began to fidget around in my arms.  
"Aww, stop, shh…" I verbally comforted as I prepared to burp her again. This time I managed to grab the towel we had specifically for this purpose and sling it over my shoulder. As I gently tapped on her back, I relaxed knowing that I had successfully breastfed on my own. With no outside help, I felt like I had taken my first step as a new mother. I couldn't speak for Ryan, but at that moment I felt like parenting wasn't as hard as I thought it would be, and that maybe, just maybe, I would manage.

~Ryan's POV~

It had taken an hour for Natalia to feed Emily and place her back in the crib. _Holy shit_, I thought. _If she wakes up every two hours, that means one hour of sleep between every feeding. _We had only been home from the hospital for a total of three hours, but it had felt like days. And two days ago, when Natalia and I were fussing over her cold sweats, seemed like an eternity away.

I managed to keep my eyes open just long enough for Natalia to return from the nursery and all but fall into bed. I haphazardly slung my arm around her and surrendered to sleep within seconds. All too soon, the familiar sound echoed throughout our room. I stumbled out of bed, nearly falling over the nightstand, and glanced at the clock. 8:10. The sun wasn't even down yet. I dragged my feet down the hall and entered the nursery, clicking the crib down and picking up my tiny bundle of pink. Now dressed in a light pink onesie as opposed to the hospital blanket, she looked even smaller than when she was first born. I knew Emily would be tiny; Natalia was a petite woman. But holding her in my arms was a completely different story.

"I've got you, it's okay," I whispered, attempting to calm her down some before handing her over to Natalia. _What if it's a dirty diaper?_ I realized I had to figure out how to change her diaper soon, and even though I wasn't good at it, I knew it was possible. I mentally prepared myself, reciting the steps that I had memorized weeks before. _Strap her down_. I couldn't even think. Even if I wasn't on the verge of exhaustion, Emily's shrill cries still filled the room. _Unsnap the onesie_. I had cleared two steps, I could do it. _Open the diaper_. I pulled the dirty one out and placed a clean one underneath her. Finally, after a couple minutes of frustration and a little bit of luck, I managed to have her in a clean diaper, and neither one of us were seriously injured. However, her cries did not stop.

"I know, I know, you want your Mommy." I lightly bounced her up and down in my arms, whispering and cooing to her before heading back into the master bedroom where Natalia was waiting.

"What took so long?" she mumbled in a sleepy daze.

"I had to change her diaper."

"You changed her diaper?" Natalia was suddenly alert.

"Yeah, I think I did it right."

"I'm impressed." She smiled at me, the first one I had seen since we had been home. Smiling was just too much effort to exert, even though under all of the exhaustion and weariness, joy was the most prominent emotion. Holding Emily pulled such a strong feeling out of me, and it almost pained me to be apart from her. But with Natalia housing her food supply, she didn't seem to have any problem separating from me.

"Emily, you have to stop crying if you want to eat," Nat gently said, offering her breast to the baby. Finally, her cries subsided and the soft sound of her drinking milk filled the air.

"See, isn't that better?" My wife cooed. I heard my cell phone ring somewhere in the room, but where I had last set it was a distant memory. Somehow, I managed to find it on the floor next to the nightstand, and picked it up on the last ring.

"Hello?"

"Hi, Ryan, how are you doing?" Calleigh's voice rang through the speaker.

"Tired, but I think we're managing."

"I'm bringing over dinner. You and Nat are probably hungry, and I know you're way too tired to make anything." Truth be told, I hadn't even thought about food for myself. I was way too busy trying to figure out my role as a father to actually cater to my own needs.

"Oh, uh, okay. Bring your key and just walk in. We'll be here."

"I'll see you soon."


End file.
